The Bullying of Women Gamers: It’s Time To Stop…Really

There’s been a lot of focus on ladies in gaming recently.

Unfortunately it hasn’t really been the positive sort; no attention drawn to the fact that women are increasingly entering the gaming industry- or that women make up nearly half of all gamers these days (not including the numbers on social gaming)- or that more and more video game companies are creating positive, female playable characters.

No, the focus has been predominantly on the backlash so many women in gaming receive on a regular basis from their peers.

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Which is just so sad for so many reasons.

Of course, lady-bullying is by no means a new development in the gaming world, but there has been a remarkable amount of flagrant public attacks.

First there was The Oatmeal comic (which was later retracted and apologized for), then the attack on Anita Sarkeesian for her Kickstarter campaign to analyze female characters in the gaming industry, than a twitter rampage from gaming writer Ryan Perez against female gaming icon Felicia Day.

Now I’m not here to talk about my own personal opinion on women in gaming and how they are generally treated.

And I’m not trying to open up a debate about feminism, misogyny, men’s rights, or anything along that nature.

I’m simply here to say that we as gamers are beyond this, and the quicker we all realize that than the faster we can escape the terrible niche society believes we all fill; that all gamers are anti-social, violent, ugly, cave-dwelling monsters who hate women, and are incapable of any modicum of self control.

Which is why we all have a responsibility to stand up against the sort of sexist raging against women that has been going on lately.

Again, you might not agree with what Anita Sarkeesian or Felicia Day do (which is completely your right- I don’t agree with a lot of things people do) but nothing will ever be accomplished and no real point will ever be made with sexist, unrelated remarks or threats of violence. Additionally, no voice will ever be taken seriously that spouts unintelligible hate speech- and no group that consorts with such individuals will benefit from such an association.

There is a degree of anonymity that the internet lends us all- your name is unknown but who you

are is still crystal clear considering what you speak about and where you speak up.

There is no mystery as to who threatened Anita Sarkeesian- angry male gamers- and an anonymous commenter in a gaming thread represents us all.

Which is why internet bullying is so destructive to the gaming community; it portrays all male gamers in a terribly negative light because of the few who lash out incoherently.

I know a lot of male gamers (and a lot of female gamers) and none of them would ever even consider attacking a woman simply for being a gamer and having an opinion.

But because of those who choose to cower behind their handles, crying out sexist violent comments they wouldn’t dream of uttering in real life, the world has seen the gamer and not been pleased or impressed.

All of the positives of gaming is forgotten and we are left with the stench of those fools who wanted to troll a woman for no other reason than that she is a woman with an opinion.

Forgotten are all the recent strides made in the gaming industry towards creating a more tolerable and friendly environment, or that women play games than ever before, or even that it’s proven gaming improves motor skills, memorization and reading skills in children.

The focus now is on the rampant sexism in the gaming world, and it isn’t what the majority of gamers (men and women) deserve.

We don’t deserve to be painted as sexists, or creeps, or trolls, when the vast majority of us are not. I don’t blame this on the media, or those who read the stories and make the generalization, I blame it on those who ignorantly create the stereotype.

And so should you.

The gaming industry can be the most embracing and encouraging community, and while in the past it has been predominantly male driven and occupied- as more and more women enter STEM positions there will be more in the video game industry, and there is no stopping that.

But why would anyone want to stop women from joining the gaming community? On a personal level I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve been able to instantly bond with an old friend/distant cousin/new colleague over a shared enthusiasm for a new release or love for a childhood classic (and to be honest I don’t think my fiancé and I would be as close without our Magic the Gathering: Duels of the Planeswalkers or Left 4 Dead 2 all night marathons).

Women playing and having opinions about video games is an inarguably positive thing; the only negative I could possibly think of is that the video game world will be less of a boys club- but when has a boys club ever represented anything but stagnating product and repetitive ideas?

Which is why it’s so important to stand up against this destructive behavior; why The Oatmeal’s apology and Ryan Perez’s dismissal were necessary, and why I’m confident the gaming community can do better.

We need to take this to a personal level of responsibility. If you see this trolling or attacking happening don’t shrug your shoulders and move on, speak out! Your comment is just as anonymous and so much more important in that it demonstrates that there are those in the gaming community with empathy, intellect, and common sense and that we don’t encourage or allow behavior that taints as all.

Donate to and/or encourage those who stand against pathetic attempts at oppression, help prove that the gaming community isn’t one that encourages blatant, ignorant discrimination  (an excellent example being Anita Sarkeesian’s now famous Kickstarter campaign raised over $158, 000, especially impressive considering her original goal was 6,000).

The fact is that the sexist gamer stereotype exists because of these fools, so don’t let them choose how the world sees and defines you. Fight against their ignorance and help prove that gamers are not cretins, but everyday people who share a love for the fantastic, cooperative and imaginative.

And as for women in video games, the bottom line is that video game companies want women to play games, women want to play games, and most men want women to play games.

Those trying to enforce their own warped gender standards about who can and can’t game or have an opinion about gaming are clearly just threatened individuals who don’t have the intellectual aptitude to create logical arguments or even comprehend the positives that women bring to gaming.

I don’t think those bigots deserve to be the representatives of the gaming world, do you?